Insider tip

I work in customer service. I've worked for banks, cell phone companies, Internet service providers, insurance... you name it. I'm not going to mention where I work now but I will give you a great tip.

Normally you only call customer care when something's wrong, we're used to dealing with irate people. It's reasonable you are in a bad mood, though 98% of the time you're just pissed about a fee that you KNOW applies according to your terms of service, but still you think its unfair.

Well. Here's the insider tip to help you get the most out of your call. DON'T BE A JERK! Before you grab the phone, punch a wall a few times until the blind rage fades, then call. Trust me on this one, a humble attitude will get you out of the nastiest screw-ups. Like nothing ever happened "we know it's not your fault, sir". On the other hand acting like the world is against you will get you a NO. You will ask for a supervisor and he will give you a NO. He will mail you a copy of your contract where you agreed to whatever just happened. The funniest thing is, it's probably not even a real supervisor, just another operator with a bit more experience.

The root of all evil: Corruption

So the other day I was watching a talk show in Univision. Only because it was on a TV in a waiting room. And it was pretty much about this dude who can't "find work", just like every other talk show in a Spanish network. The guy happens to be an illegal immigrant who left his country because there was no "work" there, and now is having problems at the US because of "the economy".

So I ponder out loud: "Is it that in (random country) nothing pops up after you plant a seed?"I mean if it were a desert country I could understand people jumping the border, but whats up with these people? Both countries are made of the same kind of dirt, have the same kind of air and water. Both have the same resources at their disposal. What is wrong then?

The answer came swift. "It's the corruption" said my wife.

Of course! I mean there is rampant corruption over here, but I guess it's not as bad. In most of these countries the rich people run the show. And you're either filthy rich or poor. The big fish will eat the small fish. There is no middle class because of this. Most people own nothing, they can't even plant a seed to feed themselves, because they don't own any dirt! They have to work for the man, just like feudal times.

The most common definition of corruption is the abuse of power. Like the case before in which those with wealth will exploit the poor. Another example is when those in a position of leadership abuse this authority. The interesting thing is that you may notice most of these cases, the corrupt entity obtains it's power from the masses in a non-forceful manner.

So to stop corruption all one has to do is deny these entities this power, be it wealth or authority. In an extreme circumstance one could take it away, but I'm no big fan of violence, so lets just consider denial. To stop giving.

Denial of wealth: Most probably you've read or at least know something about The Wal-Mart Effect (a long and tedious book about the effects of said stores in the world, not just the economy). Well, I'm not saying read it and follow it like a bible, but knowing that kinda stuff will make you think twice where do you spend your money, and it's not about Wal-Mart at all. The dilemma is similar to that of buying stolen goods, you get the stuff for cheap (It's a steal!) but you are actually paying a person to steal! Think about where your money is going. Here's a hint: the dollar is going to where that immigrant I mentioned before is going, to where the factories are!

Denial of authority: Ah, if you're among the lucky that l.ive in a democracy, this one's a piece of cake! When your turn comes to vote. Think about who you're voting for. Whow much did they spend in a campaigh? Why are they selling themselves like a can of pepsi? Who is paying for this advertisement and what will they ask for in return? (read: Denial of wealth) Think about where your vote is going, and ask yourself why aren't there more options.

Yeah. That's pretty much it.

How I hate World of Warcraft

Hello. I haven’t had much time to blog lately, so I thought I’d treat my faithful readers with an instant blurb of hate (AKA rant).

As the title implies I hate the game known as World of Warcraft. Why do you ask? Well, that’s the funny part, you see, because I’ve never played that game. As a matter of fact, based on what I’ve heard, gameplay-wise, it seems to be quite a neat game! The reason for all of the hatred is simple, though, and I’m pretty sure many of you have felt it before. I hate the acronym “WOW”. and I hate the popularity of it. It’s ludicrous.

• Friend: “I installed a new game {not related to World Of Warcraft) and my videogame console died”
• Me: “WOW!”
• Friend: “Hellz yeah WOW is the shiznit yo!!”

If you fail to see the irony of this conversation (you’re probably within the game’s target audience), allow me to elaborate. The expression “WOW!” has existed possibly since before the English tongue was established. It’s quite a phenomenal expression only surpassed by champions such as “WOAH!” or “DUDE!”. It is used to express surprise, admiration, wonder, or pleasure.

So next time I say “WOW! That’s neat!” and my expression of glee is truncated by the mention of this game, I will slap the person responsible for such faux pas. The world has been properly warned.

Sick for teh win.

You, know. I love getting sick. I really do. I mean sure, you're miserable, but at the same time, getting sick is an unexpected challenge in your life. The best part is once you heal, you realize how good it feels to be healthy.

Next time you get sick remember my words and you’ll automatically feel better. You could apply this logic to pretty much anything. When you’re broke, you sure appreciate when you finally have some to spend. I can only imagine the misery of being born rich, how will you appreciate your wealth if you don’t know what it’s like to be poor? How will you know the joy of a piece of bread if you’ve never been hungry? If I ever strike gold I know I’ll figure out a way to remind myself of the times when I was poor.

About the unexpected challenge, think about it. Why is it that games have rules? I remember when I was a kid I would do silly things such as walking around with my eyes closed, pretending to be blind, or pretending I was missing an arm. When I am ill I try to obtain a similar experience.

That’s your healthy dose of logic for today.

I want proof, not leads!

Warning: This post is a follow-up to the previous. Reading is highly recommended for context.

It’s funny how I mentioned not having to do homework, yet, I found myself spending the entire day doing homework. Not because I wanted to, though. I had to make up for some stuff I hadn’t done for college, history class, to be exact. So there I was half-assing the whole thing when the subject of “Creationism VS Darwinism” came up.

The first thing that struck me is that those were the names used for the two parts. Even though both insist the expression is wrong. I read more about it but there was not much I didn’t know, or needed to know. I had been thinking of a follow-up to that post since I posted it. That was a very busy day and I had no time to sit and think of a proper analogy to convey my logic. I’ve had enough time now. Please, consider this chain of events:

1. Bob tells Timmy at school that his mom told him his dad made his little sister out of sugar and spice.
2. Timmy decides to further investigate, and discovers Bob’s sister is made of neither.
3. Timmy and his friends analyze this and come to the conclusion that Bob’s father does not exist.

This is an exaggerated way to explain it, so that it is even more obvious. What happened back at the days of Darwin was not unlike this schoolyard tale. Then, mankind in general had decided to explore the universe around it, and to seek understanding beyond what had been taught to them, mostly by the church. Those were times of religious wars, Inquisitions, witch hunts and such. One day, this great man discovered what he called evolution… he explained how creatures would adapt to their surroundings over the generations until a new species was born, and eventually, how man had done the same.

1. The church taught Darwin that God made Man out of dirt.
2. He investigated further and discovered man as not made of dirt.
3. The masses analyzed this and came to the conclusion that God does not exist.

What went wrong there? Let’s go back to the schoolyard. Timmy’s discovery was one of great value. And I’m pretty sure Bob figured out his mom lied, or at least was mistaken. Maybe his dad lied, or was mistaken. If Bob and Timmy sat down and discussed this they would probably end up talking to Bob’s mom. Bob’s mom would either tell the truth, if she was lying, or if she was mistaken she’d tell Bob to ask his father. Let’s suppose Bob’s mom was actually convinced her husband had said the truth. Bob’s dad is in a country far away. What would be the next logical step for Bob and Timmy? Set out on a quest to find Bob’s magical baby-making powers? Sure, Bob would eventually grow up and make his own children, but he has no proof his dad could not have used sugar and spice, and this troubles him.

I’ve heard people making fun of Ben “the shiznit” Stein’s expression “Lightning striking a mud puddle”. Have they not figured out that is what Darwinists are telling the masses? “We know man evolved from apes, and apes evolved from Jurassic tadpoles, but that’s all we know, therefore your God does not exist”.

Where did these… Jurassic tadpoles or whatever-the-lowest-species-known-to-mankind-is-called-thingies came from? Where did this world, capable of sustaining life come from? Did it just appear out of nowhere? How come it is so perfect? Even if time and space are infinite, the odds of this just happening are overwhelmed by the odds of the whole thing being destroyed before it was finished! This crap used to keep me awake all night as a kid.

Science will never be able to deny the existence of God, because of his Godly nature. Science may one day prove the existence of God, if, say, God one day decided to appear in Oprah.

This is where the argument ends. Timmy will continue to research, while Bob will actually write his dad every day, hoping for an answer. Timmy and Bob hang out after school and go to the arcades. Mr. Scientist, please, I beg you, continue your research. Mr. Believer, keep on praying, maybe one day God will show up.

The conclusion, based on simple schoolyard logic (I make myself giggle sometimes) is that the terms "creationist" and "darwinist" are inappropriate, that there is - or should - not be such "points of view" and that both are neither opposite, parallel or perpendicular.